my story

My shaman journey, 2012

It all started with a rebirth experience after I had gotten terribly ill, the worst sick in my life

I felt a disconnection from my body , and like being reborn

since that day I feel love for myself and everything I see
before that I felt hate for myself and didn’t accept everything, not necessarily hate for others – but I didn’t accept myself

I just hated myself for many years, completely careless, tried to destroy my body

after that rebirth experience that night, synchronicity increased intensely
started meeting 5 people a day who had stuff to tell me, out of nowhere
they would literally knock on my door, call me, write me on facebook, if I went outside the door 3-5 people would come up to
me and ask direction or talk about the weather etc.

then I started getting information from my spirit animals somehow
I had a few budgies, and they were tame

it seems I kept receiving healing messages from both spirit animals and my ancestors in my trance sessions
each session healed both myself and people around me

and I tried my best to spread what I learned and learn from each session

one session I apparently hadn’t done my preparations
I was meeting several ancestor spirits and they seemed angry, felt like they entered my body
and felt intense pain for many hours, kept laying down and almost screaming in pain
they told me to “respect the anscestors” – that was the message I got, confused me quite a bit

I didn’t know what that mean, or that I was performing spirit communication in my sessions
I thought the messages I was receiving was from my higher self.

But now it all made sense, most sessions I have had I started seeing the eyes everywhere, then messages that applied
as good to me as to other people
messages that healed my soul everytime and helped me heal others next days most times, spread the love I received

not this time, I felt pain in the session and a little bit drained
I researched this time as I didn’t know what had happened, usually I felt connected to good spirits of some kind , several

presences and full energy next day, like being reborn  – meet new people, out in nature etc.

apparently native americans and other traditions, african tribes, shamans etc. have ceremonies to respect their ancestor

when we go into trance we enter into the dimensions of the dead
we bring back healing messages, heal our own soul, to bring that love to others, in the name of the anscestors and the holy


apparently I hadn’t been doing my preparations too well
I was sick and just wanted a relief from the sickness, and my anscestors taught me that is a bad way of communication
they basically entered my body it seemed and gave me intense pain the whole session
when session was over I felt quite a bit drained, but still learned valuable lessons

the best ways of performing ceremonies for me:
– walk and sit in nature regularly
– psytrance / trance music
– pray regularly
– spirit animals (mine seems to be budgies – it is like I understand them somehow and like I receive messages from them

– crystals , grounds
– help others, spread the love – and remember that what you are spreading is not your own, it is the love of the holy spirit

/ anscestors
– eat healthy
– be aware of all times, of synchronicites – often your spirit animal will meet you in nature

when performing trance sessions:

– have an intent, or help others before donig it, so you are grounded and have learned from previous sessions
– remember to ground and protect yourself
(visualize clear light suddrounding you – holy spirit, visualize connection to the ground)
– offer to the ancestors (show them respect, they are you and trying to help you)
– call on anscestors , ask them what they want

I have seen everyone around me change completely, after healing myself
and everyone I meet in strange ways and become friend with apparently are also into divination or are aware of the soul-body


no coincidences.

I feel like a new person every day, like a child again, 1996-2012, suddenly I feel like my normal self
felt possessed somehow for many years

it all started with a demonic sleep paralysis, I hadn’t felt like myself for years since that, only after my awakening
lost the love for myself and everything I saw that day, became careless about myself
but when I found myself and remembered who I was it all reversed.

seems lucid dreaming has access to the spirit realm too..
it is a good idea to remember that no demons can cause you any harm if you don’t fear
only if you fear.
go straight for them, look them into their eyes, them they will try to get away.

I don’t like sharing this story with most people, as shamanism is not accepted in this culture
but I am aware that anything I have mentioned here others have experienced in other cultures now, but I wasn’t at first, it

was strange at first, thought I was going crazy (but at the same time I had the best clarity of thought I have ever had,

noticed everything).

my shamanic awakening started when I realized that most illnesses start in the soul
and everything is a reflection of your inner state of being (soul)
I am not a full shaman, but I try to spread the love I receive in sessions to people around me and reconnect to the earth.
I have had very intense health issues for almost 2 years, my awakening started a few months into it, and I become the

opposite person of before almost, but same person as always (inner being never changes).

I now try to respect the ancestors in every session , I did in most other sessions
I usually never tripped to know it all, I tripped for the love and to bring the love back with me.

I am now aware of the spirit world it seems, that I am a soul in a body just like everyone else here on earth, and that there

is a spriit world with old souls that try to communicate with you, but only if you treat then with respect
you meet the soul which meets your frequency, so if you do help others etc. you meet loving spirits, if you abuse stuff you
meet abusive spirits.

Always do your prepations, and learn from each session.

Remember that if you do work, you possibly change the whole universe, so only work for the highest good, to heal, to bring back healing, to respect the ancestor relationship.
I usually pray to the holy spirit to heal through me and protect me.


My Old self
Used to eat pizzas every day for 12 years, often 2-3 times a day
smoked cigarettes and marijuana daily, in huge amounts
careless about myself, only eating, doing schoolwork and sleeping was my life for many years

complete opposite person now, seems that if you don’t live as your thoughts, there is only one way you can live


2 thoughts on “my story

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s